As we prepare to face another year of more uncertainty ahead, I share a few ideas which I hope you find useful on the precipice of 2022.
First…
I’ve been thinking a lot about the traditions we have around a new year. New beginnings are so helpful for us to reset our goals, but the part I’m struggling with this year is how we kind of assume that after a tough year, an easier year surely will follow. It’s more than just hope.
It’s almost like we feel we “deserve” things to be better, and that this sense of being “owed” is enough to make it be so.
But of course, we don’t wield that kind of power, and whether this year is better or worse than 2021, at least on a global scale, this is largely out of our hands.
Every year is filled with challenges and successes, wins and losses and pain and peace. Some years have more of the hard stuff than others. A quick peek through history reminds us repeatedly of this.
So instead of facing this new year with great expectation and naïve optimism, insisting that it be “HAPPY!!!!”, I’m thinking a better greeting is simply to say “Hello” to 2022 and usher it in with eyes wide open, and let it unfold as it will. Meanwhile, we focus on what we can do to influence positive outcomes around us in the areas that we can control.
How?
Please, please spare yourself from making grand and sweeping New Year’s resolutions.
I believe in baby steps to win over big goals, and trying to carve out personal resolutions to last 365 days has never worked for me (or anyone I know).
Instead, I ask myself four coaching questions, and then re-ask them on a quarterly (or monthly) basis to help guide me forward intentionally. Here they are in addition to sharing openly some of the thoughts I’m formulating for myself on each of these:
1) What do I want to realistically achieve in my business this year and what are the quarterly milestones?
- I’ve added the word realistically for myself as I’ve been known to set extremely unrealistic business goals which are more like wishful thinking rather than things I can actually achieve.
- I love this tip from Shawn Achor in his book “Before Happiness” which suggests we set goals which we’re 70% likely to achieve so we stay on track with them, rather than feeling demotivated when we underperform against unrealistic expectations.
2) What do I want to learn to grow my brain and capabilities?
- Usually this is one of my favourite goals to set, and I’ll admit that right now I’m not feeling it. Blame it on Omicron. Our household has been in quarantine over the entire holiday season having succumb to COVID for Christmas. And while I’ve often dreamed of having downtime like this to do nothing but learn like a sponge, lethargy has set in.
- My plan was to have read cover to cover Jon Kabat’s Zinn 600-plus page manual called “Full Catastrophe Living” outlining his Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Program in time for back to work first week in January. So, I’m giving myself tons of self-compassion (do you need a dose of this too?) and the quarter to reach this milestone.
3) What do I want to focus on to be healthier and happier?
- I realized in quarantine I need to explore more pleasurable hobbies ... just for me. I’m always so busy, that I haven’t spent nearly enough time cultivating activities that bring me joy for those quiet moments in life. I got some practice in lockdown as my daughter taught me how to draw “zentangles” (a very novice example below) which I’ve been doing by the hour because it’s so relaxing.
- Not to worry, I won’t be quitting my day job to take up this arty activity. However, I’m glad it’s shown me how I want to be uncovering more simple activities to bring me more peace.
4) What do I want to focus on to be a better person?
- Tough one....
- For me, it’s challenging the assumptions I make about others and striving to be a less judgmental, more compassionate person. I always thought I had this one covered.... but somewhere along the pandemic (and perhaps as a result of so much isolation and loss of connection), I have slipped into a habit of forgetting some people – especially ones I may have difficulty with – have needs, wants and a desire for health, happiness and wellbeing .... just like me.
- It has been hard becoming aware of this, but I’m grateful for the insight in order to make change.
I hope you find these questions useful, and I’d love to hear how you’re thinking about 2022. In the meantime, may you have lots of the good stuff in 2022 and influence as many positive outcomes as you can for yourself, your family, your organizations and communities.